I had this dream, when a person I loved so much left me without saying goodbye, I don’t know why, but it keeps running on my head. The tears I cried on that dream are bugging me like hell. Annoying, because such dream could make feel melancholic. HAH!
I live in a big two-story house with my brother and one servant. I seldom meet my parents, due to my father’s job as a doctor in Pontianak. He can’t quit his job to live with me here in Jakarta. And my mother has to stay there too to take care of my father. So here I am with my brother.
My brother and I go to medical school, and we’re doing clerkship now, so I can say, we seldom have conversation, or even meet. I’m not a kind of sister who sends lovely messages to her brother. So, pratically, I live alone.
Friends? I have many friends. I have some good friends who are ready to be called whenever I want to.
Lover? Naaaa… I have a crush on someone, tapi gue ga secinta itu untuk ngejar dia.
HUBUNGANNYAAA..
Ya, waktu gue bermimpi buruk itu, sebenarnya yang gue mimpiin itu adalah nyokap gue. Ampe sekarang, gue masih inget mimpi itu, dan rasa sedihnya masi kerasa ampe sekarang. Sebenernya kalo dipikir-pikir, manja sih gue, banyak kok temen2 gue dari daerah yang ketemu orang tuanya cuma setahun sekali. Yah. emang gue manja.
LALUUUUU
Tadi gue nonton Let’s Go To School film nya Bi Rain. Di situ ada cerita seorang ibu ninggalin anaknya, supaya anaknya hidup lebih mapan ama orang lain. Entah kenapa gue langsung inget nyokap gue. Just remember about her, about things she has done to me. About bad things I’d done to her. Dan yang paling gue inget adalah, saat nyokap gue merawat gue pas gue sakit tipus, dan dia ternyata juga lagi sakit tipus. Dan gue inget, dia ngerawat gue pas gue muntah, padal abis itu dia juga muntah-muntah. *sigh* bisa ga ya gue ntar sesayang itu ama anak gue? ga usah jauh2 deh, bisa ga ya ntar gue sayang sama nyokap gue terus pas nanti nyokap gue udah tua renta, pas nanti nyokap gue even ga bisa jalan, ga bisa mandi sendiri, ga bisa pipis atau pup sendiri, bisakah gue ngerawat dia tanpa bersungut-sungut.
Gue sayang nyokap gue walaupun tiap nyokap nelpon gue lagi asik ama kegiatan gue sendiri dan rada males2an jawabnya hehe. Maap ya mami sayang, semoga nanti aku bisa seperti dirimu.
PS : buat papi, you chose a perfect woman as a mother and a wife for our family